HUMOR PICS

The room was full of pregnant women and their partners,
and the Lamaze class was in full swing. The instructor
was teaching the women how to breathe properly, along
with informing the men ...

In Scotland, the most important time for a young lad is when he "comes of age" and is allowed to purchase and wear his first kilt. A couple of weeks before his important birthday, a young lad went to ...

LICENSE TO STEAL
Two Kentucky men tried to pull the front off a cash machine by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck. Instead of pulling the front panel off ...

A group of psychiatrists were attending a convention. Four of them decided to leave, and walked out together.
One said to the other three, "People are always coming to us with their guilt and ...

One day, three friends go hunting. Only one is very good, so the second two plan to watch him and learn from what he does.
They arrive at the hunting cabin, and get all set up. The next day, ...

A construction boss in Boston was interviewing men when along came a guy named Vinny from New York. I'm not hiring any wise-ass New Yorker, the foreman thought, so he made up a test hoping that Vinny ...

A city boy, Kenny, moved to the country and bought a donkey from an old farmer for $100.00. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day. The next day the farmer drove up and said, "Sorry son, ...

In 1996, a Californian judge ruled against James Pflugradt's estate and in favor of the deceased's former landlord. The judge allowed the landlord to keep Pflugradt's $825 security deposit because ...

When people say, "I’m so tired it's not even funny" or "my head hurts so much it's not even funny", why would it even be funny in the first place?
Do stairs go up or down?
Why is there ...

A Blonde And A Brunette Are Running A Ranch Together In Louisiana. They decide they need a bull to mate with their cows to increase their herd. The brunette takes their life savings of $600 dollars ...

An old Priest was mending his church fence.
Little Timmy has been standing closeby, for a long while.
The priest turns to Timmy and asks, "Do you want to speak with me, my son?"
...

A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar.
A $40 speeding ticket was included.
Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40.
The ...

There was this American who comes to Canada, and he goes into the unemployment office. An Intake worker takes him in and sits him down in her office. He tells her, "I've been drinking my whole life. ...

"Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call. I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet ...

1. Blast the Phantom of the Opera at midnight and sign along with it at the top of your lungs.
2. Smile at the walls constantly and talk and laugh with them.
3. When he/she says, "Is ...

A doctor at an (insane) asylum decided to take his inmates to a baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands. When the day of the game arrived, everything ...

Four farmers were seated at the bar in a tavern. At the table next to them sat a young girl.
The first man said, "I think it's WOOMB." The second replied, "No, it must be WOOOOMBH." The third ...

Two Arabs boarded a shuttle out of Washington for New York. One sat in the window seat, the other in the middle seat. Just before takeoff a fat, little Israeli guy got on and took the aisle seat next ...

A married couple are driving along a highway doing 60mph, the wife behind the wheel. Her husband suddenly looks over at her and says, "Honey, I know we've been married for 20 years, but I want a divorce." ...

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One, a man will screw anything.